How did I get here? Adventures in Change, in Loss, in Renewal, 2022 to 2023

The last time I wrote I was stuck in bed, quarantined with what would become known as "flurona" (COVID plus the flu).  Of course, I took it one step further and somehow contracted both influenza A and B, cuz I'm an overachiever like that.  This time I was hospitalized for acute cholecystitis and acute cholangitis, fancy terms for an inflamed infected gallbladder and duct, not to mention a bunch of gallstones.  At least the British hospital was fairly posh, prioritizing a full tea service every afternoon. The fact that I'm just sitting down to write another entry now, two years after my last illness-induced entry, may be a sign that life is just a bit too busy.  I suppose I should do a better job of slowing down and taking the time to write.  One friend told me my body has figured out that the only way to get me to stop and rest is to rip the rug out from under me so I'll stop for a bit.  She may be right.  The past two years have been a lot.  It was probably time to rest.

The past two years are more than can reasonably be captured in a blog post (and honestly, if I weren't writing this for myself and my kids, I wouldn't bother even trying to fill in the missing time), but since I've started writing I may as well do my best to capture a few of the highest highs, the lowest lows, and the specialest moments in between.

My parents were visiting us all the way over in Dar es Salaam, Tanzania back in 2022 when I was laid up last time. It turns out Mom is the world's greatest nurse and even though she and my dad both ended up getting sick as well, she nursed us all back to health in time to head out on a fantastic safari in the Serengeti and Ngorongoro Crater (except for poor Philosopher who spent most of the Serengeti sick), a trip to Zanzibar with Young Man and Philosopher, and swimming with whale sharks and scuba diving on Mafia Island.  It was a fantastic visit (in spite of the sick days).  

The rest of our time in Tanzania was a whirlwind. I spent several weeks on a TDY to Juba, South Sudan, as well as trips to Zanzibar and Mwanza for work (which I loved).  We sailed and scuba dived and spent most evenings and weekends with friends.  We spent a wonderful anniversary trip in Pemba, scuba diving and later went back to Pemba and to Fish Eagle Point for dive trips with friends.  It was a busy time.  We played hard and worked hard as we prepared to say goodbye to Tanzania.  Despite attempts to keep him happy, the Paraglider grieved the loss of his sailboat, perhaps envisioning it as a metaphor for lost youth, lost freedom, and began wandering.  He said it meant nothing, that he was happy and wanted to stay together.  I chose to believe him.  Probably the frenetic pace of playing, the constant searching for the next adventure was an impossible attempt to sate an unquenchable thirst.  I should have seen the signs.  I should have known what was coming.  Somehow, I did not.

I left a couple weeks early to finalize the purchase of a new home in Albuquerque (yay!) and help Charming Child settle in after boarding school finished for the year.  The Paraglider stayed back to finish packing out the house and to take the boys on a few more adventures.  It only took a day for him fall in love and another few days to decide his future lay in a different direction from ours.  It only took a moment for his voice across the phone to completely shatter me.

Did I mention already that the anniversary we celebrated in a romantic oceanview room overlooking the Indian Ocean only a few months earlier was our 21st?  Or that the days before he met her he had been calling me multiple times a day to tell me how much he missed me, how he couldn't wait to be together again, how he was so grateful he had made the best decision of his life when he asked me to marry him?  Did I mention that as much as I wanted to believe the avalanche of love and promises and apologies across the distance, they had begun to ring hollow?  Did I mention the way my world shifted, stopped, fell apart when I realized I was being abandoned for a child, left with no job, no prospects, no plan, and only a suitcase worth of belongings?  Did I mention the way my ability to trust shattered into a thousand irretrievable pieces?  Did I mention the strange shock and how I kept living but didn't really keep living for the next few weeks while we were together but really his heart and mind were with her?  Did I mention the way that Charming Child wrapped me in their arms and told me they were proud of me, that he never deserved me and that it might not be easy to see now, but that I would be better off without him?  Did I mention they were right?

The next several months are a blur.  I applied to hundreds of jobs, did my best to distract the Philosopher from the upheaval, to create a normal, happy home, tried to understand and forgive my intentional blindness, my unending patience (cowardice?), my naiveté, everything that had thrown me into such a vulnerable and precarious position. I cried, a lot. I lost my appetite for food and for life. I walked. I practiced yoga. I read and read. I refreshed old friendships. I worked on myself, poking at all the ugly truths I had hidden away.  I got a tattoo.  I planned a roadtrip to take the Philosopher to visit universities, to do some job interviews, to visit family, to fill the limbo of life unemployed and unsettled (and to get far away from the Paraglider while he took his new love to all of our favorite places, poisoning our memories, sleeping with her in our bed). I spent so much (but never enough) time with family, hiking through the Sandia and Santa Fe mountains as often as I could get away.  There were so many beautiful moments to temper the nightmare.  As lost as I was, I was already becoming myself. 

And then the job offers started coming in at last.  We chose a place with lots of snow, for the Philosopher.  And once again we were packing everything we owned into our suitcases, jumping into the car for a new start, a new beginning.  At last, I thought, we can make a home, we can settle, we can breathe.  We planned to stay, if not forever, then at least a few years, probably until the Philosopher graduated from high school.  We drove up to this place we'd never been, opened the door to an adorable little apartment, lugged our suitcases up the stairs, and relaxed.  We were home.

The Philosopher joined the snow boarding team and tech crew for the theater.  He made friends.  I worked hard to master a job that was different from anything I'd ever done.  We celebrated the new year in Chicago.  We hiked the Ice Age trail.  I went snowshoeing nearly every weekend while the Philosopher was on the mountain.  And then, just a little more than a month after arriving, I got an email I was never supposed to receive.  

Before I knew my life was going to change, I had applied for the Foreign Service (again).  It was a little game I played.  I liked keeping the option in my back pocket so that when officers looked down on me I could say I was in my role by choice, not because I couldn't pass the test.  I knew I'd never actually join the Foreign Service since our family and sticking together was our priority.  I guess I knew (or feared) more than I admitted to myself that year, however, because when the Paraglider started panicking, trying to fill an unfillable vacuum of need within himself, I'd scheduled the final test I needed to pass to become a diplomat.  I took it and passed.  Even then, however, it would take several months, a year or more maybe to actually get an offer to join the Foreign Service.  The Philosopher and I decided it would be too disruptive to move again.  I decided to put that career possibility on hold (again).  I asked them not to consider me for openings.  

And still, I got the email.  The email that I almost deleted without considering.  The email that I jokingly mentioned to the Philosopher, with the assurance that I was going to say no.  The email that we couldn't quite put out of our minds.  As we sat eating dinner, he said, I think you should do it.  I said, No way. We just got here. You JUST started school.  He took another bite, nodded then said, I think I miss it though.  I said, Are you sure?  I thought, this is crazy, crazy, crazy, I never want to move again. And also, I thought, Oh please say yes, this is what I want more than anything.  We made a list of pros and cons. The list heavily favored staying put.  The Philosopher frowned, said, I don't think that's everything.  He added, subtracted, and edited until the list evolved, favoring another change. He looked up and smiled.  We hugged each other.  It's going to be really hard to move again, I said.  I know, he said.  But we can't not do this. I hugged him tighter.  Have I mentioned that this kid is one of my very favorite people?  And yet, deep inside my gut I worried, just a little.  I'd be giving him a lot, no doubt, but did he really understand what he'd be giving up by moving again, by giving up the opportunity to put down roots?  Did I understand what I'd be giving up?  Would it be worth it?  We laughed, a little nervously, and started planning our next move.

And then we were in Virginia.  The Philosopher started another school (his fourth in one year).  He jumped right into theater, made friends (and missed his old friends, old school more than he expected).  Charming Child joined us along with Prince.  My parents and sisters came out to celebrate my graduation, my swearing in as a U.S. diplomat.  And to celebrate Charming Child's graduation from High School (as in most things, done on their time table, in their own way).  We caught up with old friends, made new ones, hiked the Shenandoah National Forest, Great Falls area, and unending trail system. We explored the city's museums, festivals, and farmer's markets.  The Philosopher flew back to visit old friends, then met up  with Young Man to fly across the world to visit their dad.

And then we were packing again.  Saying goodbye (again), exploring a new country, a new city. Making a new home.  Finally, we've caught our breath, relaxed into this new place.  I love my job.  The Philosopher has new friends. Charming Child has found new love.  We've all grown together, and as individuals.  There have been some really hard things (there always are) and even more really beautiful moments.

There are so many things I could say about the past two years, about how hard and confusing and distressing they were, and also how many amazing opportunities and experiences we've had.  Sometimes we just sit, the Philosopher and me, and look at pictures, talk about how things were, how they've changed, the things we are grateful for and the things we've had to overcome. There were times over the past two years when I was angry.  Angry at myself for not setting better boundaries, for not leaving sooner, for pouring so much of myself into a black hole that I almost lost myself.  Angry at him for his betrayal, his selfishness, his lies.  Angry at society, at my upbringing, at my bad luck.  But mostly, I am happy.  I have grown a lot, learned a lot, and become more confident.  I trust myself.  I like myself.  I have taken this space to stretch.  I have some regrets, but mostly, I am grateful to be who I am, where I am, with the family and friends that I have.  And there is so much of life ahead.  So many adventures yet unlived.  

I am ready.

Losing some shoes, but still moving forward...

Over the past couple years, this family has lost some shoes.

One pair walked off to university.  They come back for holidays, hugs, and games, but never often enough or long enough.  Still, I love following their footsteps through new adventures.  I'm so curious where they will eventually land (and constantly scheming how to bring them back as often as possible).  Whenever I see their shoes in the entryway, it makes me smile.

Another pair decided they weren't a good fit for this family and walked off to check out other shoes, other feet.  It was hard but I've stopped looking for those shoes in the closet, have even started to enjoy the extra space.

Another pair comes and goes. They are here now, trying to find their trail through this life.  I'm so happy they found their way back to me and also hope they find their path away when the time is right.  In the meantime, they've brought another pair of shoes to join us for now.  They're nice shoes; I hope they stay for quite awhile.

And that leaves four shoes.  Two of those are gaining independence, venturing away from home sometimes to visit the shoes that left, other times to explore or travel with friends.  They always come back home, but each time they leave, I can't help but think of how soon it might just be my own two shoes in this house. 

To go from ten to two in just a few years is an enormous metamorphosis. It has been a time of grieving, growing, and breathing.  I've become a lot more comfortable in my own two shoes.  So even though our journey has changed, life is still just like a new pair of shoes, and I am busy breaking them in.

2021: A year of adventures during a global pandemic

Well, all it took was finally getting the dreaded virus and a mandatory 10-day quarantine locked in a room all to myself to update this blog.  (Don't worry, it's day 4 and I'm starting to come back to life.  New studies show, I may even be practically invincible after this infection.  But I digress. . . )  Even 10 days won't be enough to do a proper update after such blatant disregard for years, but a start is better than nothing (and fair warning, even a start is going to be long).

Since 2021 is drawing to a close, it's probably a good time to look back and relive the highs and lows of an exciting and tumultuous year.  We moved to Tanzania at the end of 2020 and lost no time exploring the wonderful adventures this country has to offer.  From the cloudy mountains of Lushoto to the safari savannas at Mikumi to the breathtaking beaches of Zanzibar, every long weekend we did our best to get out and see everything.  

And the best part was that most of the adventures we took involved just us (and whenever possible a buddy car with friends) and were outside, so we felt safe getting out and exploring despite the uncertainty of the pandemic in a developing country.  We spotted lions and elephants and giraffes and crocodiles.  We climbed through rainforests, spied chameleons and stick bugs, slapped mosquitos, and passed through traditional farms and villages on the way to dramatic waterfalls.  We ate fat juicy sweet mangos, sour passionfruit, and tangy pineapples.  We enjoyed avocados almost as big as our heads and ate fish caught fresh from the ocean that day.  We learned Kiswahili greetings and niceties (Mambo! Poa. Habari! Nzuri, salama), heard the echoes of "mzungu, mzungu" (white man, white man) everywhere we went, and sweat constantly under the relentless hot sun, never quite acclimating.

Even daily life around home was an adventure in itself.  Every evening, walking our dog along the cliff trail as the sun set and the waves crashed below, I felt grateful to be near the ocean again after so long away.  Every commute to work, as we wound around pedestrians with fruit or sticks or fabrics piled high on their heads and vibrant kitenge clothes, chaotic market stalls, Masai in traditional garb, dirt roads, beggars, children in school uniforms, packed city buses and noisy bujajis, I wondered when it would all start to feel normal.  The answer?  Probably never.  Instead, we embraced it.  We brought home chickens and goats.  Ate bananas, mangos, and coconuts from the trees in our yard.  Got used to living with ants and geckos and spiders in the house.  It seemed that for every inconvenience, there was a balancing reward.  On one side of the scale sat the bugs, the malaria, the heat, the inconsistent power and water, the frustratingly slow bureaucracy, the neverending dirt and garbage everywhere.  On the other, the warm Indian ocean, rich cultural experiences, fresh fruits and vegetables, rich new experiences.  It was no contest really.  We love Tanzania.  

We joined the yacht club so just minutes away we could access a beautiful beach and opportunities to kayak, dive, snorkel, and sail.  Funny Guy got scuba certified and is a great diver, joining us a few times a month.  He and I took sailing lessons on little Laser optimists while My Man continued his theoretical yacht skipper certification.  We bought a Hobie16 catamaran, which My Man confidently sailed from the dock armed only with his earlier laser sailing experience from boy scouts 25 years earlier.  It was enough.  After a few months of racing around the bay (and only one near-death experience with Funny Guy), he was ready for the next challenge so we traded the cat for a 27' racing monohull called Smackwater Jack.  It was the beginning of sun-soaked weekends racing the winds, laughing with friends, fishing and chasing tuna boils, picnicking on deserted islands, snorkeling at Sinda, and dreaming of retirement on a boat (a much bigger boat).

There was less diving and safariing after that, but we still snuck away for a couples-only safari at Tarangire, a trip to Zanzibar, and a wonderful Thanksgiving weekend with friends at Mafia island, where we swam with whale sharks and stingless jellies and enjoyed some of the best diving of our lives.  

After one of the scariest calls of our lives, I made an unplanned trip back to the States in May to help our Darling Daughter.  Despite the logistical challenges and emotional turmoil, it was a great excuse to spend time with family, hiking with my mom and dad, hanging out with my wonderful nieces, catching lunch with Young Man before he flew to Tanzania, and sharing hugs with my sisters.  I even marked the passing of another decade.  A few months later I traveled again to help her transition to a new boarding school (which we love).  Darling Daughter got her driver's license and celebrated another birthday.  It was a treasure to have that time with her.  It's so hard to be away from our child--the time difference is terrible and my heart is always torn between my family here and there.  But she is where she wants to be and we are so grateful to all who help support her when we cannot be there.

During the summer, we had friends visit (yahoo!!) and My Man took them to Zanzibar and Lushoto and explored around Dar while I was in the States; Young Man flew out to join them.  After I got back, we fulfilled a promise to Funny Guy to take him snowboarding by heading to the Austrian Alps, where he carved up a glacier in July.  We stopped for a few days in Munich on the way, practically living on bikes as we explored the beautiful city.  In Austria, besides skiing and snowboarding, we hiked, paraglided, mountain biked, played Phase10, and rode cable cars to incredible vistas.  It was one of the most wonderfully restful and beautiful vacations we have ever taken.

Of course, we don't play all the time.  We work hard too.  My Man is ridiculously busy sorting out all the intricacies of human resources at the embassy, managing hiring, firing, performance reviews, bilateral agreements, award ceremonies, policies, and more.  Funny Guy's classes have vacillated between virtual and in-person but either way he is doing well, especially in math (and not especially in art).  In his spare time, he joined a Virtual Reality Gorilla Tag team, created a haptic force-feedback glove, and built his own computer.  He got a 3d printer and uses it to make parts for his engineering creations.  He performs in the school band on the trumpet and was invited to the senior band.  He loves scuba diving, tolerates sailing, took surfing lessons, and cooked dinner for us all summer (my hero!).  Young Man returned to school in person after a virtual freshman year and continues to amaze us all by expertly balancing academics with a dynamic social life, working for the school paper and yearbook, ROTC, and his photography hobby.  I keep busy in Public Affairs trying to navigate what that looks like during COVID-19 in a country with limited Internet penetration.  When COVID-related travel restrictions were lifted this fall, I squeezed in trips to Mwanza, Kigoma, Dodoma, Unguja, Pemba, Mafia, and Kilimanjaro all into the last three months of the year!  It was exhausting but rewarding work, with the added bonus of getting to see even more of this unique and fascinating country.  

Over the past year, we've oscillated between telework and the office, trying to balance safety and commonsense, effectiveness and uncertainty.  We've had the bonus and bain of living in a country with little available information.  We knew COVID was making the rounds, and anecdotally it was raging at times, but without official statistics, it was hard to know exactly how careful to be.  We wore masks indoors or in crowded outdoor areas (which we tried to avoid altogether) but generally left the masks home when we were sailing or dining outdoors with friends.  We got our COVID vaccinations and then the booster and felt even safer.

And then, I got a headache, a sore throat, a fever, and a positive COVID-19 test.  Just after my incredible parents made the crazy trek to come visit (and just days before Young Man was scheduled to land for winter break).  Fiddlesticks.  And so I sit, alone in this room, unable to see my parents or hug my husband or sons.  But I am grateful.  Grateful that I was able to receive vaccinations and a booster shot (because if it's this bad even with those, I can't imagine facing this bug without them!).  Grateful that my parents are angels and planned a long trip so after this is all over we will still have lots of time to hang out.  Grateful that it looks like I may not have infected the rest of my family (negative tests for them today).  Grateful that my quarantine ends in time to celebrate Christmas with my family!  Grateful that even though the past few days have been miserable, I am healthy and recovering.  Grateful for a crazy year, where we have experienced and done so much, despite the rollercoaster of COVID-19.  Grateful for amazing friends and family to share it all with.  It has been hard.  It has been wonderful.  It has been 2021.

And that's a wrap.  Over to you 2022. 

2019: It's a Wrap!

As Christmas music plays, wrapping paper and ribbons lie strewn across the floor, and each of us happily play with new treasures, it seems the perfect time to reflect on a year rich with new experiences, new friends, and even new family members!

The year began with one of our craziest adventures yet.  The morning before My Man and I were set to fly off to a long weekend getaway, Darling Daughter talked us into a scouting trip to the local pet market.  We'd been toying with the idea of getting her a new cat for awhile, but weren't sure we were quite ready.  We should have known better.  An hour later we were driving home with two sets of very happy siblings: Darling Daughter snuggling her new purring kitten and Funny Guy snuggling his jet black puppy.  The pair had been too cute to pass up, best friends snuggling together with longing eyes, and besides, they needed a loving home.  We should have known that once they were in our children's arms, there was no return.  We made a mad dash to the store to get the necessary pet essentials, apologized to our nanny for the new additions, and headed to the airport with the sinking suspicion that we were either completely crazy or totally awesome.  The jury was still out.

We had a great trip (though My Man was secretly jealous of Funny Guy getting to snuggle with the new puppy) and by the time we got home, Funny Guy was sleep deprived but happy from training his new charge.  We helped out and let him get a few nights' sleep but Ash is definitely his dog and from day 1, Funny Guy has been the one taking care of training, cuddling, and caring for him.  Darling Daughter was completely smitten with Prince.  One look at our kids' faces helped us realize that in spite of all the crazy of traveling the world with two pets, it would be worth it.  

The rest of the year passed in a flurry of school, work, trips, and fun.  We visited Turkey, Poland, the Czech Republic, Egypt, and London on family trips.  The kids traveled for school tournaments: Krakow (Young Man, knowledge bowl), Bucharest (Young Man, soccer), Budapest (Funny Guy, robotics), Baku (Darling Daughter, speech & debate); Funny Guy spent a week in Switzerland for Scout Camp; Young Man skipped the last three weeks of his junior year to do a science research internship at the University of Arizona; we all spent a few weeks visiting family in the United States; My Man spent a month working in Botswana and Namibia; I spent two weeks in training in DC (and snuck in a great Boston sightseeing trip); and My Man and I snuck off for paragliding and exploring in the Canary Islands, Italy, and Spain.  And we've had a great time exploring Kyiv, scouting, and working.  It's been a busy year, but one so rich and full of good things.  And some of my favorite moments were those spent laughing around our dinner table, walking in the park, playing games, and  celebrating each others' successes (and supporting each other through the harder times).

It's been a year like no other (our last year with Young Man at home, our last year in Kyiv, our last year, at least for a long time, so close to Europe).  We've said some hard good-byes and made new friends.  We've grown (quite literally--I think Funny Guy grew about a foot taller and Darling Daughter is threatening to overtake me!) and had some setbacks and a lot of successes.  The kids have blown us away with their creativity and commitment and accomplishments.  Life is so very good.  Thank you, 2019, it's been a great year.  We are looking forward to finding out where Young Man will head off to school and looking forward to exploring all that Tanzania has to offer.

Adventures in Turkey

When the travel agent said, "Well, this resort includes a waterpark and has a paragliding landing zone on property.  It also happens to be all-inclusive and sit next to one of the most beautiful coastal hiking paths in the world.  Flight time?  Only 2 1/2 hours from Kyiv," we didn't have to think long.  The hardest part turned out to be convincing Darling Daughter and Funny Guy to part with their new best friends for nearly a week.  Assuring them that Prince and Ash could survive without them and would still love them when we got back, we jetted toward the clear blue waters and beautiful mountains of Oludeniz, Turkey.

The five days ran away from each other as we swam, hiked, flew, relaxed, and ate.  There were so many paragliders in the air it was hard to pick out My Man!  Darling Daughter and Young Man decided to take the leap themselves and it was one of the highlights of the trip to have all three flying together for the first time ever.

Funny Guy pretty much lived in the water, moving from the water park to the heated infinity pool to the beach and back again.

We took a water taxi to a hidden beach called Butterfly Valley where Young Man and Funny Guy and I hiked up to a beautiful little waterfall.  My Man timed it just right and managed to land on the tiny beach and join us for our boat ride home.

Another day we headed into town (Fethiye) to browse the stalls of colorful carpets and ceramics, Turkish delight, spices, and more.  Fresh squeezed orange juice was less expensive (by more than half!) than a bottle of water.  We hiked up to some old ruins on the mountain and the views from the top were well worth the climb!

Young Man and I tackled a 7 km section of the Lycian Way, soaking in sunshine and stunning views.  The wildflowers were out in force and the day could not have been more beautiful. 

When it was finally time to say goodbye, I was ready to negotiate an extension but everyone else agreed that five days was just enough time.  Darling Daughter and Funny Guy were more than excited to get back to Prince and Ash (not to mention WiFi!), Young Man needed to get back in time to take the SAT, and My Man was looking forward to seeing his bees and chickens.

Although the weather had been cold and wet while we were gone, Kyiv welcomed us home with warm sunshine and an explosion of lilac and apple blossoms.  Darling Daughter took a deep breath and sighed contentedly:  It's good to be home.

A few more photos (from Young Man):

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year!

2018, what a year!  We welcomed the new year on a warm island beach on La Palma, Canary Islands, Spain, and continued the adventures all year long, adding lots of new country magnets to our fridge.

All that was crammed in between work and school and scouts and sports and homesteading and more.  We've definitely been doing our best to live life to the fullest.  Young Man headed to Vienna with his Knowledge Bowl team to compete in CEESA.  My Man spent 10 days flying in the Himalayas in March (where he spent more than four hours a day flying, covering hundreds of kilometers exploring the dramatic mountain range then spent the rest of the days relaxing and enjoying the warm sunshine) while the rest of us enjoyed the biggest snow storm of the year here in Kyiv.  Young Man and Funny Guy were awarded the Presidential Award for Excellence for their grades, Darling Daughter performed in the schools' "My Mother's Story" production and starred in the school play "Jack vs Jill," and both Darling Daughter and Young Man were voted onto the student council at school.  My Man took me to Cyprus to celebrate our 17th wedding anniversary (wow!).  Young Man survived a miserable Week Without Walls, hiking in the rainy and cold Carpathians, while Darling Daughter got to go 4-wheeling and exploring Ivano-Frankivsk for hers.  I orchestrated several large events at the embassy, including the Eggstravaganza, end-of-the-year BBQ, and 4th of July picnic and also spent a week in Budapest finally learning the nuts and bolts of my job before accepting a nice promotion and a new job (working in the Embassy's Public Affairs Section), and My Man managed an incredible influx of Russian applicants after the U.S. diplomats were kicked out there, helping manage the huge uptick in work with minimal impact to his section with some ingenious adaptations.  He was also selected to attend training in Frankfurt, where I joined him for a long weekend to see castles, visit Heidelberg, and see Gutenberg's press (I think I got the better end of that deal).  Somehow, in spite of the increased workload, he managed to harvest a bumper honey crop from our resident beehives and set up a hive over at the historic Ambassador's Deputy's house as well.  We also got baby chicks and watched them grow into gigantic egg layers (at least the ones that didn't turn out to be delicious roosters!).  Young Man worked at the embassy in the IT section (his first real 9-5 job), while Darling Daughter worked and Funny Guy played at the school summer camp.

At last we headed out for a well-earned vacation back to the States, which started with an epic family reunion--a houseboat on Lake Billy Chinook at the Palisades (in spite of the engine trouble); then we showed the kids our stompin' grounds in Bend and Redmond, roadtripped to Crater Lake and the redwoods and Gold Beach (for the first time with My Man), built sandcastles and went clamming in Newport, and then headed back to Redmond where we missed our first ever flight thanks to a bag left at the hotel in Bend (no pointing fingers here, there was plenty of blame to go around--though it is amusing to hear everyone's excuses)!  We spent most of the next week camping, skiing, swimming, and hanging out with friends and family at Deer Creek Reservoir, fit in two college visits, and stuffed our bellies with Mexican food.  Yum.  Too soon we headed back home to Kyiv with a one-day stopover in Amsterdam where we saw the canals, cute houses, Anne Frank House, and more, though we were so tired and jetlagged we may not remember much.  Before we knew it, school was starting back up again and the kids were keeping us busy with scouts, sports, activities, and more--Darling Daughter played soccer, joined the robotics club, started horsebackriding lessons, played basketball, and participated in speech and debate.  Young Man played soccer, Ultimate Frisbee, knowledge bowl, served on Student Council, started a table tennis club, and grew his portrait photography business.  We ran a few family 5Ks, celebrated a few more birthdays, and then headed to Egypt for the most epic scuba diving of our lives and a chance to ogle the great pyramids and catch some sun with friends before the long dark winter (Young Man opted to head to Israel with his soccer team for a tournament there instead, where he swam in the dead sea, toured Jerusalem and the Holy Land, and walked through the ancient city of Jaffa).

Funny Guy skipped a year in math (way to go!), Young Man headed to Budapest with his soccer CEESA team, and Darling Daughter played on her soccer CEESA team here in Kyiv.  My Man and I won best couple's costume at the embassy Halloween party this year with our bee keeper and queen bee costumes and Funny Guy won his entire school costume contest with his epic "kid in a box" illusion costume (it was awesome!).  My Man and I snuck away to explore Rome, Naples, and the Amalfi Coast for a weekend (one last chance for sun!) and then the snow was already here.  After a whirlwind of end of semester activities (concerts, courts of honor, etc.), we kicked off the holiday season with a family trip to Bratislava and Vienna (where got to go ice skating at the Rathausplatz Ice World rink, visited five different Christmas markets, wandered old cobblestone streets, saw a castle and palace, and even caught a few English movies in the theater!).  Young Man was selected as a finalist for the competitive KEYS science internship program (breathlessly awaiting the final word!).

The finale of the year was a traditional Christmas Eve.  Though we wish we could have shared it with family, we invited friends to join in the fun and enjoyed all the traditional foods and games and stories and songs that make the evening special.  Today was a cozy wintery Christmas day, hanging out as a family in PJs, talking, playing games, eating leftovers and candy, Skyping with family, and reflecting on the generosity and adventure of the previous year.  I am overwhelmed with gratitude.  Sometimes I feel like we pay a high price with missed memories and opportunities so far from "home."  But mostly I feel so grateful to have the opportunity to make each new place our home, adding new traditions and friends to mingle with the old, learning new things, exploring new places, and doing our part to make this world just a little better as we journey through.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year from our home to yours!

Adventures in Italy: Pompeii, Trail of the Gods, Vesuvius, and Naples! (Part 3)

Although we could have stayed in Norma forever (peaceful, warm, beautiful, with fantastic paragliding . . . ), we couldn't quite give up on the rest of our trip, so after a morning flight, we headed south.

We got to Pompeii about 3 p.m. (last entrance is at 3:30 during low season) and unfortunately, all of the official guides were gone by then (normally they are available, just hanging around the official ticket line). Instead, we got the audioguides, which were OK, though I would have preferred a guide to tell the full story. Still, Pompeii was impressive and there was more to explore than we could see in a couple of hours. Of course, one story of Pompeii is those 4,000 who died in the eruption. There are a few casts to remind us of their loss.

The bigger story, though, is of all the people who lived! Pompeii was huge. A thriving trade center where people lived and loved and created. It was fascinating to learn of their water systems and societal norms. 

The mosaics, many of which have been transferred to the archaeological museum in Naples, were stunning. With so much of the art now removed, however, we decided we had to see the full collection (more on that later).  The craziest part of Pompeii for me was how old everything is, but still so well preserved.  And they haven't even finished excavations yet!

Traffic from Pompeii to Sorrento was surprisingly slow and finding a good place to eat was harder than expected. We finally opted for a little restaurant where we tried the traditional Margarita pizzas (named after Queen Margarita and boasting the Italian flag colors—red sauce, white mozzarella cheese, and green basil).

We were a little underwhelmed (one basil leaf?!). It may not be traditional, but I like a loaded pizza! Still, even mediocre pizza in Italy is delicious and we ate every bite. Our hotel had an incredible view of the bay and Mt. Vesuvius and My Man set an alarm so we could watch the sunrise. It was worth the early wakeup.

We drove straight to Positano after breakfast, intent on hiking the Trail of the Gods (Il Sentiero degli Dei). Although most people hike from Bomerano to Nocelle (the path with an elevation drop and the best views), since we were driving from Sorrento I decided to start at the trailhead in Nocelle, above Positano, to minimize driving. My Man and I were going to hike half the trail (roundtrip) to avoid the problem of a transfer. My Man, however, had been hit by a cold and that combined with the terribly hard beds we’d been trying to sleep on meant he wasn’t thrilled by the idea of the hike. Instead of canceling, he gallantly offered to drop me off at the trailhead in Nocelle and pick me up at the other end. He’s really awesome like that. I could have kissed him at the offer (if he hadn’t been so germy) since hiking the trail had been one of my top priorities for the trip. It’s a good thing he is an intrepid driver, because the road up to the trailhead (and back down) is pretty insane—narrow, crowded, and extremely windy (apparently most of the Amalfi coast road is similarly difficult and if we go back we will avoid driving there).

I followed the well-marked signs to the trail’s beginning (and climbed about a million stone stairs on the way!). Unfortunately, that’s where the clear marking ended. I stood looking at the big official map and then turned to look at the trail. Or rather, trails. I could make out at least six paths branching out from the official sign with no official markings or indications about which was the actual trail. The fact that I thought to take a picture at this point to document the many trail options should have been a sign (haha, sorry, bad pun).

Stumped, I set off on what looked like the most well-used path. After awhile, I met a group of goats, their bells clanging merrily as they ate. Not long after that, my well-used path began to dissolve into a series of goat trails and soon it was impossible to tell what was the main path. Hmm, I wasn’t sure if I should head back to the beginning (about 10 minutes behind me) to try a new path or, it seemed that I could see a more established path along the hillside above me. I probably should have turned back. Instead, I climbed up to the other path. It was a lovely path. I was surprised not to see any official markings, but the path was wide and clear and headed the right direction, so I happily hiked along. It had a decently steep incline, but I was expecting that. I was, afterall, hiking the trail backward. The views were stunning.

As the trail neared a steep ravine, it also became smaller and steeper. It was clear I was not, afterall, on the Trail of the Gods, but on the Trail of the Goats. So, faced with the decision whether to continue or head back and try to find the official path (now more than 30 minutes behind me), I opted to push forward since it was such well-used trail that I figured maybe it would still go through and I didn’t want My Man to be waiting too long for me on the other side (this is where My Man would interject that while I am a master planner, my on-the-fly decision-making skills could use a tune-up). Soon after, however, the trail deadended into a spectacular cliff—towering above and below. There was no option but to turn back.

The sun was shining, the sky was blue, the ocean was spectacular in front of me. So, while the setback was frustrating, it wasn’t all bad. As I backtracked, I considered the experience a bonus hike. About halfway back, I spotted the real trail far, far below me down the mountain. With a wooden banister and other people hiking there, it was obviously the real deal. The question was how to reach it. I could continue all the way back to the original sign and hope that I made the right choice this time, or try to make my way down to the path I could see. Since there were myriad goat trails heading down and I was already behind schedule, I opted for the more direct path. There were a few setbacks when goat trails ended in drop-offs, but it didn’t take too long for me to make it down the mountain to the actual trail to “begin” my hike.

My shadow selfie celebrating finding the correct path at last!

And wow. The earlier hiking had been wonderful but the Trail of the Gods was really phenomenal on a whole other level. I loved stumbling across old stone ruins, turning back to see the precarious and colorful seaside towns perched on the mountainside and running down to the ocean, and the cliffs set a dramatic backdrop for everything.

I counted myself very blessed to have a husband patient enough to humor my passion for getting away from it all and hiking. As I climbed, drinking in the fantastic views and sunshine, I was grateful just to be alive.

I would hike that trail again tomorrow (or tonight) or any time I have the chance. It was definitely worth it and one of my absolute highlights from our trip (and the real trail is well marked with red dots/dashes every few meters. Not sure how I missed it originally—must be less clear at the end because most people are traveling the other direction). Anyway, I made it to the end in just over 2 hours (estimated time for the trail that direction without detours is 3 hours, so I felt pretty good about myself). My Man just barely beat me to the other side and took the chance to hike a bit of the trail himself. Perfect.   

Although hiking the full trail meant I missed the Amalfi Coast drive (we didn’t stop at the Emerald Grotto as I’d planned or lunch in Positano), I felt like I’d seen plenty from the trail and My Man had had more than enough of that drive, so we headed overland toward Mt. Vesuvius.

The trail up Mt. Vesuvius isn’t very long, but it’s steep and after my morning scamper my legs were burning! We reached the top and were adequately awed by the views of Naples, the ocean, and Pompeii. We looked over the edge into the deep gulf of the crater and watched the sulfurous steam waft toward us. It was humbling to imagine the magnitude of the eruption that buried Pompeii and Herculaneum while standing on the rim of the volcano that is overdue a similarly huge explosion. After a sufficient time spent gaping and imagining, we headed back down the hill to tackle the chaos of Naples.

Parking on the edge of town (at Parcheggio Brin), we taxied straight to the Archaeological Museum of Naples to explore the riches of Pompeii and Herculaneum. The mosaic collection is unbelievable, especially after exploring Pompeii. I was amazed to learn that the museum has housed the Pompeii artifacts since 1750—that means that the museum has been a museum longer than the United States has been a country!

After the museum, we had one goal: pizza from the birthplace of pizza!  We walked from the museum to Spaccanapoli, soaking in the intensity and grittiness of Naples. It was fascinating. And then we found it, the best pizza place in the world: Vesi Pizza. My personal pizza smothered in mozzarella cheese and tomatoes and arugula was big enough that I ended up eating it for three straight meals! My Man managed to finish his pesto pizza in one sitting (impressive!). You'd think that after all this pizza we'd be ready for something else, but no. I would eat that pizza again tomorrow. And the next day. And . . . well you get the picture. After pizza it was time for one more Italian gelato (yum!) before heading for home.

And that was our trip: sun-drenched, cheesy pizza and gelato-filled chaotic cities, historical sites, and beautiful mountains and sea. Did we see all of Italy? Nope. But saw a lot and we loved every bit. Italy—we love you! This trip was not our last!

**Disclaimer, we visited during the beginning of low season when crowds and prices were down but we lucked out with perfect weather.  We probably would have had a less enchanted view of Italy if it had been cold and rainy or hot and crowded.  November travel is a gamble, but for us it worked great!